Stage is set now, you know the cast and crew. So I'm in bed asleep, and in this hotel, I've got a nice king bed all to myself, several pillows splayed all over. Well at some point in the night, I roll over from one pillow to the next. These two voices start talking to me in "motivational tones". "C'mon Dan" "You've got to switch pillows right, more elevation" "Lets do it again, you've got this" "YEAAAH, thats it" "Thats how you swap pillows".... I'm flopping in this bed. I mean sitting up and diving to the next pillow... I woke up, the pillows all have dents in them...I was really doing this. I imaging the look on my face was priceless. I remember sitting there with my lips about to utter a w, so they're kinda puckered...and I just uttered this wwwwwwwwhat?
I don't know what happened, why I'm getting sleep tips from Mike and Pete... chalk it up to #crossfitdreams
Wednesday:
So yesterday (Wed) sucked. I'm kinda glad I didn't have a laptop last night... I learned this lesson long ago, and that was don't write (emails, letters, etc) while I'm upset. To quote Left Ear from the remake of The Italian Job... "I had a bad experience". Someday I may share, but don't count on it. On to the WOD.
Being out of gas is rough, apparently the dive bombing pillow changes didn't do it for me from a rest perspective...and I could feel it during our warmups, specifically the barbell warmups. Needed movements to loosen up, but I was huffing by the time we were done with them... not a good sign (to me). I guess the positive is that it's "just" a weights day, I should get some opportunities to breath.
2 position clean (floor then hang)
40% x 6
50% x 5
60% x 4
70% x 3
Barbell Row (5x5 @ 70% of 2RM from last week)
Weighted Push-up (5x10 weighted if you can)
Really, the only part (of weights) I struggled through was the 2 position cling. It was a chore tonight, but I'm glad I pushed through it. Towards the end as I was getting up to my 70%, I found some of that extra juice (who's out of gas again? pffft) and dominated that last set. Felt good. Think I may have dropped the weights as a mini-celebration. I reference the weight drops, cause I was making fun of Andy and Jeff when they were doing it....but I think it may be therapeutic after all. Barbell rows...I actually did what my 2RM was from the week before. I remembered noting that I needed to add MORE WEIGHT in Wodify, and so I did that, no special remarks here, got a little coaching on posture, fixed, nailed it.
Weighted pushups. Might have to make this one a goal in the near future, especially after getting one strict pushup done. 50 pushups from my knees kills my arms. I mean 49 and 50 almost had me face plant. I can't imagine putting a weight on my back right now...but that day is coming, and I eagerly look forward to it. If nothing else, it looks bad-ass. That and doing them on your knuckles.
It's not good-bye, it's see you later.
This will be difficult to write, I apologize in advance. I've had a week of awesome and aww shit. Awesome was finishing that Tuesday workout without quitting. Awesome was on Monday "knowing" that my work stuff should push out at least another 3 months, so I'm going to be here for a while. Aww shit is getting an email after 2pm yesterday telling me to cancel my travel, there is some budget tightening on the client side, and travel is one of the targets....
Thats my world blowing up right there, in case you needed it explained. Six days ago I wrote about puppy love, and how much CFDS means to me. That email ripped my heart out.
I grew up as an ARMY brat. I lived in Germany the first 8 years of my life. I've experienced this kind of heartache before with good friends moving away. I'm really at a loss for words... I think the best way I can explain it is this, and please don't think me a monster, it's just how I am. The last time I felt like this was when my dog died in 07. I've had relatives pass between now and then, and this feeling and my dog are sitting pretty at #1-2 in the past 15-20 years for gut wrenching/tear jerking moments in my life. Maybe I'm just wired differently.
Last nights WOD was tough to get through, saying some goodbyes, but I got real good at it, laughing and joking (one of the ways I've always masked problems). I almost made it without getting choked up. I stayed till after Elements left to say thanks to Gia. I'm a baby with a big heart, I didn't cry, but I did tear up. Tearing up now as I write this. Love this lady, love this place, will miss both terribly while I'm away.
Last thing she said and I helped finish. "It's not good-bye, it's see you later".
And it is see you later. I'm still on this project, so Delaware still owns me. I'm under the impression that we're just trying to get to the end of the fiscal year, then I'll be back. Either way, I don't believe this is my last...no, I know this wont be the last time I show up a CFDS. Worst case, after I cross off some of my goals, I will be coming back to prove I've done it, and of course visit with my peoples.
This was a little bit therapeutic, thanks for hanging with me.
Dream....Struggle...Victory!
We all go through this process. My dream is to get in shape, improve my strength, and beat Andy. LOL I'm starting to suspect I may even have the forming of wanting to compete, or at least get coaching certified, but one step at a time. You can change this word to "Goals" if dream sounds a little soft for you.
Struggle, I think this is apt for everyone whether it's a dream or goal, to get there, you're going to have to struggle. Thomas Paine quote if I haven't used it all ready "What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly". For me, my goals/dreams are going to take a tremendous effort, and it won't be obtained cheaply. I know if there was a pill that could melt 10% of my body fat every time I took it...and I did take it, I wouldn't value the results, and would be doomed to stack the weight back on. Knowing that, I welcome the struggle. The struggle is why I'm writing this, and for some of you, is why you're reading this. We'll push through it together, if you ever need someone to talk to, need a pick me up, or just an encouraging word, hit me up.
Victory! Finishing workouts and hitting PR's are always victories. Victories are sweet, and should be savored, but I want to encourage you to only rest long enough to make another goal, a further goal, and to start chasing that goal. Don't settle for good, reach for better.
Ok, I'm done, I'm spent. My body is tired, I wrote all this 50 different ways as I tossed and turned last night, and this wasn't one of them. I'm ready for some rest, probably sleep the entire flight and not get any more Paleo Solution read...really need to work on that book.
Parting thoughts:
I'm starting to write more and more each time...maybe I should take a page from Hollywood and make this more episodic? Maybe not, I like getting it out there in a timely manner.
Met Randi's mom last night, kinda reinforced the whole puppy love thing...maybe took it to the next level by meeting the parents and all... LOL. I'm a clown, I know.
To my friends and coaches at CrossFit Diamond State, I'll see you later. I look forward to every Facebook and Google+ post. I'll be lurking and commenting, I promise you.
To my future friends and coaches at CrossFit Establish, I'll see you soon. I hope these ridiculous posts give you an idea what kind of heart and soul I'm bringing to the table.
I'm just now discovering CrossFit meme's...it's hard not to share some of them...right now the fight club one is cracking me up, cause it's so damn true...at least for me. If you don't know it, check it out.
Cheers!
TCN
I'll say it again. It is not good bye, it is see you later. The door at CFDS will be open when you travel back to Delaware. Every coach is just an email or post away. Once you are part of the family (like it or not), you are always part of the family.
ReplyDeleteWouldn't have it any other way.
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